be nice to yourself


Some of the feelings/experiences I’m describing in this blog post most likely apply to a lot of people reading this. Uni (while I love it) is an intense, stressful place to go to school at times. I wanted to write this blog post to be honest about how I have struggled, and how it’s okay to ask for help or not do everything right.

The perfectionist in me often tries to hide the times when I’m struggling. Not only do I like to do everything well, I like to seem like I’m also succeeding without much effort (yes I know this isn’t a good mindset to be in.) This put tons of pressure on me, and made me feel kind of isolated at times. However, this year I’ve started to change my mindset.

First semester senior year has been hard for me so far. On top of the pretty substantial amounts of homework we’re assigned in our classes, there’s also the ever looming college application deadlines to meet. Not only is it a ton of essays to write, each essay seems like it could make or break my future. No pressure. And then even after all of the work, I want to hang out with my friends and make good memories in my last year of high school.

Early in this semester, I realized that I wasn’t going to be able to get through this year on my own. I was never one for talking to my parents about things (especially feelings!) One night, however, I was extra stressed and frustrated about not being able to figure out my calc homework. I went downstairs to ask my dad for help, and ended up having a really long conversation with him about the pressure I put on myself and how stressed I was all the time. It was hard for me to talk about, because it felt like I was admitting a “weakness”, but the conversation, and simply knowing that my parents were there supporting me, helped me a lot.

Since then, I’ve tried to take care of myself more. If I’m feeling overwhelmed, I talk to someone about it. If I’m exhausted and really don’t want to do homework one night, I’ve started allowing myself to take a night off without beating myself up for it. Realizing in order to get through the stressful times in life I actually have to take care of myself, and recognizing that although I’m 
struggling I am doing my best, was a really big step for me.

Uni, undoubtedly, is hard subbie through senior year. Each year has its own set of challenges and everybody’s stress and struggles are valid. I wish that I had learned to ask for help and realize that I don’t have to be perfect all the time earlier, so that I could have been a little more relaxed throughout the last four years. As a main takeaway: nobody’s perfect, and taking care of yourself is important too!

Comments

  1. Minji ChoiOctober 24, 2018 at 9:08 AM

    I'm glad you came to this realization. I also struggled with the exact same problem for a long time (my essay 2 was on this topic). I also tend to keep everything to myself, because I have trouble telling people about my problems. Junior year broke me down in a way that I couldn't possibly handle by myself, which forced me to go and talk to people about my issues instead of letting it pile up. Now, I'm getting a bit more used to this so whenever I feel a little bit of stress or pressure I try to talk it out with someone before it starts building up.

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  2. 羅　理愛　（スミトロ　リア）November 7, 2018 at 12:59 PM

    I love this and you. It often seems as though we are all strapped in for a 5 year long roller coaster ride, trying to get through the ups and downs of our academic responsibilities while juggling extracurriculars at the same time. I've also had struggles with the college application process, because it's so easy to feel like you're not enough for a certain school - when in reality, it's the school's major loss if they don't accept students as dedicated and persistent as Uni kids. I'll be with you through it all - we are getting through this!

    ReplyDelete
  3. DJNovember 11, 2018 at 8:46 PM

    This is a really good blog post. It sounds like senior year hit all of us like a sack of bricks. Honestly, the college application process is entirely B.S, but we all have to play the game. I agree with Grace above. Uni kids aren't successful because they went to Uni. They're successful because of the drive and work ethic they have inside themselves that Uni helps bring out. With how well you're learning how to manage your stress, you're off to a fantastic start!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Samaia JonesDecember 9, 2018 at 4:20 PM

    This was so well put and what me and so many of my friends are feeling as well. Many of the students in Uni feel the need to be perfect which puts pressure on all other students to do just as well. It is also very hard for students to open up because like you said it's admitting "weakness", but it is so important to have someone to talk to. Great blog post Kat.

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